If I die tonight I want you to know

from Songs for Losers by Cryptozoologists

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lyrics

And if I die tonight I want you to know there’s a stewing on the stove that I left there with my heart in it. And though unfinished things make you sick, all living things go unfinished, so here: can you stomach it?!

And if I die tonight I want you to know that my terror and desire cancelled each other out, so that my greatest act has been to break my bread with the worst of my starvings for this desperate exhibit of my skeletal remains.

But please ignore all this mistletoe, I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just testing the waters of the self-fulfilling prophecy latent in every symbol, but oh: how hollow!

And if I die tonight I want you to know that I know there’s an edge, as far as resonance goes. Still as much as life is meaningless, readers persist in reading. And I just want to be read by you.

Congratulations on your selfhood, I can’t remember mine. I think it involved so many irrational acts of faith that the pronoun’s base crumbled. But here I am, still levitating.

So I’ll be one of many graceless supplicants tenting upon grace’s lawn…

credits

from Songs for Losers, released July 13, 2017

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Cryptozoologists Whitehorse, Yukon

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